|
Post by kingplatypus on May 20, 2019 1:34:36 GMT -5
Welcome everyone, to Platypyre 2019! Before festivities get underway, I just want to thank everyone for their patience and assure that the wait was not in any capacity a ploy whereby I was trying to buy myself more time. That being said, let's have a quick rundown! Everyone is invited to post their best burn(s), and after a week or so of heating things up, we'll have a poll(!) to determine which was the best burn! The winner of this incredible game of skill and wit will receive an honor like none ever seen before - lighting the sacrificial pyre (in a manner of your choosing) on which the Platypus, unlucky soul, will be burned! If you have nominations for others who you think could use the relaxing sensation of being cooked like meat on a spit, don't hesitate to put them up for sharing this experience - the more the merrier! Although I can't guarantee the nominees will be on board with it... Regardless, please feel free to, in addition to delivering insults so hot that the searing summer heat is a blessed relief, make suggestions on how the burning should be conducted! I'm talking location, favorite chants, background music, who leads the audience in rousing jeers, that sort of thing. I'll try to conduct frequent polls to keep a finger on the pulse of what Spiritus wants from this Chief Executive pagan sacrifice. Finally, in a week or two, the event will culminate with the burning of the Platypus! As I've said before, I think this could be one of the more charming Spiritus traditions. All proceeds will go to the Quiescent Platypus Memorial Fund, and thank you for attending Platypyre 2019!
Burns on this thread please, and suggestions on the "Suggestions" thread. Fire away!
|
|
Salaxalans
•
Bow Before the Almighty Potato
Delegate
Posts: 318
Likes: 56
Nation: The Salaxalans
Discord ID: Salaxalans#6003
|
Post by Salaxalans on May 20, 2019 17:18:08 GMT -5
I bet you put PINEAPPLE on your PIZZA!!
|
|
|
Post by Please Be Kind and Rewind on May 22, 2019 21:01:44 GMT -5
People see Jesus' face in a crop field, or Mother Theresa on a bread roll, or Elvis's face on a rusted garage door...well I just changed my toddler's diaper and Hallelujah! The Platypus is real, and he smells as bad as he looks. How much for this diaper on E-Bay?
|
|
|
Post by The Studly Spud on May 23, 2019 7:26:11 GMT -5
I hear The Platypus is going Hollywood! In the next Aliens vs Predator movie the Predator demanded that it wanted a turn at staring into the face of a disgusting creature and saying, "You're one ugly mother f☆☆ker!" Huzzah!
|
|
|
Post by Cardboard Lootbox on May 23, 2019 20:39:12 GMT -5
On Mr Potato-Head World, The Quiescent Platypus toy is what they give to their children for Christmas to mess with.
|
|
Cookie Monster
•
Free Spirit
Posts: 3
Likes: 4
Gender: Other / Decline to State
Nation: Muppet Puppet Manager II
|
Post by Cookie Monster on May 25, 2019 0:55:51 GMT -5
Hello? Is dis thing working? 🌬🌬 Where me light Platypussy tailpipe on fire? Me have matches. Me use dem when I bakes da cookies in da oven. Mmmm . . . cookies. 🍪🍪🍪
Which end of Platypussy do we light up? Dem both ugly and mismatched and look like back end of something . . . maybe use da oven?
|
|
|
Post by Muahhahhah on May 25, 2019 21:52:58 GMT -5
You're an abomination, Platypus! Even God couldn't put you together properly so you end up looking like a pot-luck of rejected end cuts. Ugly? Hah! You look like the what's left behind after the 4th Horse of the Apocalypse snagged his junk jumping a barbed wire fence. Burned!
|
|
Matrixulated
•
Free Spirit
Posts: 2
Likes: 1
Nation: Matrixulated
|
Post by Matrixulated on May 25, 2019 22:55:21 GMT -5
Well, I came here to 🔥 burn 🔥 the Platypus . . . but I can't follow that! Well done, Muahhahah, grim and graphic and ouch!
M.
|
|
Louisistan
•
Legislator
Posts: 573
Likes: 66
Gender: Male
Nation: The Spirit of Louisistan
Discord ID: Louisistan#9874
|
Post by Louisistan on May 26, 2019 12:53:33 GMT -5
Get off my street, duckbeaver!
|
|
Louisistan
•
Legislator
Posts: 573
Likes: 66
Gender: Male
Nation: The Spirit of Louisistan
Discord ID: Louisistan#9874
|
Post by Louisistan on May 28, 2019 12:23:26 GMT -5
Burn the platybomination!!
|
|
|
Post by kingplatypus on May 28, 2019 17:17:25 GMT -5
After some good burns, some which were... ha ha... really... *sniffle* really good heh heh. Ummmm, where was I? Oh. Yes. I'm going to close the thread now, because it's been long enough and not at all because my self-esteem is teetering on the brink of a cliff from which there is no return. Expect a poll shortly over which insult was best, followed by an official 🔥burning🔥 thread!
|
|